My Grandma Hoekman (my mom's mom) passed away this morning at 89 years old. She has not been doing well now for the past year, and in all honesty, I am amazed that she survived the past year. A year ago in May she took a turn for the worse and we all said our goodbyes to her while she lay in a hospital bed at Spectrum. That was tough. God, however, was not quite yet ready to welcome her home. She bounced back enough to be released from the hospital and was placed in a home here in town. She has suffered with dimentia this past year and has been legally blind most of her life. She also was not able to hear well, so needless to say, her quality of life in the end was not the best.
I brought Koby and Ky to visit with her this past Friday, as hospice had warned us that it would probably not be long due to several blod clots in her body. My mom helped me tag team the dynamic duo, who are not so use to the close confines of a shared room in home (all i can say is, thank goodness her roomate was out and about that morning....her bed made an excellent racetrack for cars!) Grandma was in and out of sleep for the most part, but did have moments of clear consciousness. When I told her that Koby and Ky had come for a visit, her eyes lit up and she smiled a great big smile. She commented on how big they had gotten and told me to keep my eye on the little guy (she has always worried that little kids with blond curls make excellent targets for people with not so good intentions.) Ky shared one of his graham crackers with her and rather than eating it, she held it for a bit and then politely put it on her water cup. While the boys continued to make a ruckus on the bed next to hers, she opened her eyes again and told me she was "going home". At that moment, I knew that she did not mean going back to her condo, but rather going home to her Lord. I was afraid to share those simply words with my mom, knowing that she already had alot on her mind. So as we left, I gave Grandma a kiss on the forhead and told her I loved her, hoping I would see her again.
Sunday night I received the call from my mom that Grandma was not well and that it would not be long. I headed over to see her and was amazed at what a difference two days made. She was breathing very deeply and it was very evident that she had fluid in her longs. She could no longer open her eyes, or move any part of her body. At that moment, I was so thankful for Friday. Thankful to have seen her smile one last time, thankful to have had a chance to look in her eyes and tell her that I love her, thankful that my boys had one last chance to see their great-grandma and most of all thankful for God's love and promise that this is not the end. This is just merely a "goodbye for now" and "I'll see you soon". I am thankful that my grandma, the southern bell from Mississippi, is new again.
One of my clearest memories of my grandma is when we would visit them in Florida and she would tuck Al and I in at night and sing us the song "Froggy went a Courtin". It is a song about a frog who wants to marry a mouse but first needs to seek permission from her uncle rat. I am not sure of the history behind the song, but will forever hear her singing:
Froggy went a courtin and he did ride um hum
Froggy went a courtin and he did ride um hum
Froggy went a courtin and he did ride
a sword and a pistol by his side um hum..........
Here are a couple of photos of Grandma. The first one is from January '07 and the second from Al's wedding in April.
Goodbye for now Grandma.....I'll see you soon!
